Saturday, December 12, 2009

Life is just a bowl of enigma.

I needs to blog again, I suppose. As you can imagine, I've been busy doing things like trying not to fail all of my classes and trying not to die and occasionally stalking while trying not to appear materialistic. Being a girl is hard sometimes.

I suppose I ought to assure you all that life has gotten better for me. I persevered through two weeks of torture and sleepless night and pressure from all directions. My carefully honed bullshitting skills earned me A's on most of the papers I turned in. My bitchass professor told me I did a really good job on a lesson I taught in class. Duh, lady. I told you I can teach.

Now I have to get through four days of finals, although I can't really be bothered to worry about them with Christmas looming so near in the distance. The only think I am worried about is the fact that they haven't rescheduled my student teaching interview. I'm hoping it's just because I'm insignificant and they forgot, not because they're not going to let me have one. I just emailed the head of the education department and asked if I can have an interview since my grades have improved so much. In case you've forgotten, I have to have this interview if I'm going to student teach and graduate next semester. Bitch better email me back.

If all goes according to plan, I'll be out of school pretty soon. Naturally, I've been daydreaming a lot about what I want to do next. I know I want to go to grad school in SOMETHING eventually, but I don't know what yet. I'm aware that it's not smart to go to grad school before I have any teaching experience, so I should probably get a teaching job in the fall. So I think that's what I'm going to do.

Here's my major dilemma: I do not want to get stuck in this hick town. Sure, it would be smart to stay here for another year or two where the rent is cheap and the jobs are available, but I reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally don't want to. I want to move to New York City. I would leave NOW if I could and never come back. I love the big city. I love the culture. I love the cold weather. And every time I go there I feel like I belong. Basically, I need to be there. That's why I'm afraid to get a decent job here. People get sucked in. This is going to sound ridiculous, but I'm actually afraid to start a relationship with anyone here because I'm afraid they'll tie me down forever. Second only to my fear of my family dying is my fear of never making it to New York. I'm a crazy person.

So yeah. That's what's going through my mind lately. Anyone out there have any connections with a school system in New York? :-P

In other news, I finally saw New Moon. I feel like a traitor for saying this, but I actually liked it. Maybe it's because I went in with such dismally low expectations (and how could I not after the waste of my life that was Twilight?), but I actually left the theatre with an odd feeling of satisfaction. Sure, there were plenty of parts that were stupid and hilarious in a bad way, but I at some point I actually caught myself thinking, "Gosh, this is SO much better than the movie version of Prisoner of Azkaban!" Most importantly, when you spend 4.5 years frolicking in an arts school bubble with hundreds of gay boys, it's nice to have Taylor Lautner around to remind you that you're straight.

Well, I guess I better get back to not studying. Anyone want to buy me this for Christmas? I need a good teacher tote, you know. :-P

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1 comment:

  1. I'm glad things are going better for you! I hope you get the interview. I dream of moving to NY too; I don't think I'm as driven to make it happen as you are, though. I hope it happens for you.

    Unrelatedly, I am hungover today for the first time in 4 years (usually I'm careful!), and I've had "Hangover Saturday" (the song you and your friend sung in a youtube video) stuck in my head all day. :)